Cautious or Carefree?

Before I got married and had a family I seemed to be carefree. I had an entraprenurial spirit and would lay it all on the line time and again for my business. Why not? What did I have to lose? I only had me to worry about. My theory was, what is the worst thing that can happen, I would have to get a job. I already had one before and it wasn't so bad, so why worry.

Well, then I met the man that I would later marry. I kept my carefree attitude towards work and finances for a while. It did become a little harder becasue it did affect someone other than me. A little caution crept in.

Then, the wammy! I had my son and all of a sudden I was cautious about my decisions. It seemed that I was so cautious about his safety that it seeped into my career, my financial decision, everything. It took about 6 months for me to realize that I had changed, dramatically. I went from a carefree, lay it on the line go get what you want entraptrnuer to an overly cautious wife and mother who ran a business.

Wow! I was shocked when I figured it out. The trick was how to change it back, or should I ? Was I being irresponsible to live more carefree with a family? Was I cheating myself if I didn't? I felt a tug of war going on inside of me. So, I made a compromise.

When I made a decision to do something, I would go for it with a blaze of glory. No holds barred. Otherwise, how would I know if I could do it or not? I decided that I had to give the things that were important to me a chance and if I was cautious I was not being me and I could sabotage what I was doing.

I also decided to show my sons (we have two now) that if you want to do something, make sure that it is what you want, feel it in the core of who you are. Then, if you still want it, go for it. What is the worst that can happen? You try again. In my opinion it becomes education on how not to do it next time.

I have decided that I would rather be a mom that has tried a lot and succeeded at a few than a mom who was afraid to try. My husband supports my decision, after all, it is who I was meant to be. Now I am authentic with both of my sons and they see me for who I am. A woman who likes to go for what she wants and feels good about it.

Since then, I wrote 2 books, a set of empowerment cards and started a non profit foundation all because I went for it. Thanks to laying it on the line and going for it, why not?